P.S. Ask your friends… why they think some people go to Asia for ‘mail order brides’ but very few people go to Africa for the same service. LISTEN to their hypothesis.”
A few days ago, London food blogger Wilkes McDermid (nee William Chong) deliberately fell to his death from the roof garden of a restaurant.
They say it was suicide, but I say it was murder.
Wilkes took the time to write out his justifications for suicide. They boil down to: he couldn’t get laid. He was successful, he was charming, he was “often the first person to spot a new food stall”. Many female “foodies” professed to love him. Unfortunately, although many female foodies loved him, none of them were willing to love him, if you know what I mean.
I’ll excerpt a few of the things he wrote:
Every time you see an Oriental/Caucasian couple in your daily life, record how many times it has been an Oriental girl with a Caucasian male and how many times the role is reversed. If there is no bias (which I am constantly told) then I expect to see a 50/50 split of Caucasian Male/Oriental female couples verses Oriental Male/Caucasian female couples. I originally performed this test 5 times and found approximately a 95% skew of Caucasian Male with Oriental Female couple. I was told that this sample set was too small so I performed the same test over four to five years until I reached the sample size of 10,000 in total split into tranches of 100. Every time the answer effectively remained the same. All the samples lie between a 94% bias and a 100% bias. This is also clearly reflected in the study performed on the databases of OK Cupid Dating and Match.com dating agencies (sample size 10 millions new users).
and
To everyone who says “why don’t you just accept it”, I ask you this. What if your girlfriend/boyfriend/wife/husband was taken away from you through no fault of your own? How would you feel? What if you were then told “it doesn’t matter, just learn to live with it”. Then what if you were told, “it’s your fault, it’s your personality that has caused that” and “stop being so negative”. How would you react. That’s what I’m faced with continuously. I can’t stop people lying to me for the rest of my life… but I can control how long my life will be and therefore how long I will have to suffer.
and, finally:
Goodbye, I wish you all the best
Here’s what Wilkes doesn’t make clear: whether he’s upset because he can’t get a white girl, or whether he’s upset because he can’t get an “Oriental” girl. It’s an important distinction. Is he upset because he’s been “trained” to want a white women by the media yet can’t get one, or does he feel that all his fellow “Oriental” (that’s the term he uses, because he’s British, not a PC American) women have been snapped up by white and black guys? He never says, so we’ll never know.
Wilkes believes that men need to have at least two of the three following qualities to be successful in dating:
* At least 5ft 10in tall
* White or black
* Financially successful
I’m two of three, so that bodes well for me, right? As fate would have it, however, I have to been to dinner twice in the past thirty days with short-Asian-guy/cute-white-girl couples. Both men are brilliant and charming but neither is terribly successful. This doesn’t disprove Wilkes’ assertions, however; the plural of “anecdote” is not “data”. Although it’s unpopular and dangerous to say it, we all know that “interracial dating” can be more properly described as “Black guys dating white girls and white guys dating Asian girls.” I’ve lived forty-three years and have never seen a black-woman/Asian-guy couple. Not never. I’ve never even heard of the existence of such a couple among my personal acquaintance.
So, if we live in reality rather than dwell in fantasy, we can see that the following things are probably true:
* Virtually all black women, a significant percentage of white women, and a significant percentage of Asian women will date black men.
* Virtually all white women and a significant percentage of Asian women will date white men.
* Most Asian women will date Asian men.
OKCupid has access to the world’s largest database of how women behave, and here are the numbers:
You can read more data here but it gives you a solid idea of the market value of various types of men among various types of women. There are just two little problems, but we’ll get to that in a second. White men and Native American men have the highest market value; Indian men have the lowest. Asian men actually outcompete black men, however, which doesn’t support Wilkes’ beliefs.
At least not at first glance, anyway. The article attached to this says that they corrected the data for height. So what’s actually shown here is how women respond to men when they’re all the same height. Out of courtesy to you, the reader, I’ll assume that you are not the kind of drooling moron that needs to be shown how the populations of different races in America compare for height. I’ll further assume that you are intelligent enough to believe your own eyes in that matter and not so stupid that you think Yao Ming and Gary Coleman are statistically significant.
So Wilkes might still be correct, because he identifies height as being important. Which, of course, it is. Women don’t like short men unless those men are rich or exceptionally charismatic. There’s another issue with the OKCupid data, and that is that the data comes from OKCupid. OKCupid serves a very specific group of people. Most of them are over twenty-five. Most of them are divorced. Most of them are older, sadder, wiser, and, if my personal experience on OKC is any guide, significantly fatter.
If you look at the Wiki article on interracial marriage you will see that
ome 24% of all black male newlyweds in 2010 married outside their race, compared with just 9% of black female newlyweds. Among Asians, the gender pattern runs the other way. Some 36% of Asian female newlyweds married outside their race in 2010, compared with just 17% of Asian male newlyweds. Among whites and Hispanics, by contrast, there are no gender differences in intermarriage rates.
Alright. So when you mash all those numbers together, you see that there are two groups of people who have their available dating and marriage pool significantly reduced by interracial dating: Asian men and black women. In each case, we’re talking about a fifteen-percent reduction, at least. That correlates well to the OKCupid data which shows that black women and Asian men are far more statistically likely to respond to messages than their white counterparts.
If you watched the HBO TV Series “The Leftovers” last year, you saw what might happen if just two percent of the world’s population disappeared suddenly. When you’re dealing with massive populations like that of the world or the United States or even the UK, minor percentage changes translate to hundreds of thousands of people. For black women and Asian men, it means that if everything shakes out statistically, they have about a one in six chance of being alone for the rest of their lives. That’s very far from being insignificant. It means that one out of every six Asian men is a Wilkes McDermid: charming, witty, well-liked, totally alone. It means that one out of every six black women has no chance of finding someone for a committed relationship, which if you think about it goes a long way to explain some behaviors that other people would attribute to racial characteristics or solar rays or random chance.
If you’re willing to engage in some serious doublepluscrimethink here, let’s examine some things suggested by the above data about interracial dating:
* It was a net wash for white people. White women date black guys, white men date Asians, everybody feels spicy and vibrant, nobody faces a higher chance of being alone as a result.
* It was good news for black men, who have a greater range of dating options. (Although note how black women on OKCupid prefer white men. Why older black women with significant dating experience would prefer white men to black men is a topic so radioactive even I’m not willing to touch it.)
* It was good news for Asian women, who have a greater range of dating options.
* It’s been catastrophic for black women and Asian men.
And let’s boil that down to the following statement:
* The net result of permissive attitudes towards interracial dating in America has been an expansion of variety for white people and tremendous damage to many people of other non-white races.
Now let’s be deliberately provocative about it:
* The only people who really benefited from permissive attitudes towards interracial dating in America are white women who like the erotic charge of dating black men and white men who want more “submissive” women.
And turn the knob up another notch:
* Interracial dating benefits white people and hurts people of color. It benefits the white community and hurts other communities.
Once again:
* Permitting or encouraging interracial dating is, inherently, a racist policy.
Crank it to 11:
* The best thing we could do for PoC communities would be to encourage them to stop dating white people.
And twist the knob right off:
* By taking black women and Asian men out of the dating and reproductive pool, the net effect of interracial sex in this country is to whiten it and dilute the ethnic purity of other races. In other words, interracial dating is genocidal in nature. It amounts to a war on black women and Asian men.
The problem is this: As someone who was raised in a liberal, intellectual, Western tradition, I “know” that the last couple of statements are incorrect. The problem for me is that I cannot easily identify why or how they are incorrect.
What I do know is this: The media in this and every other Western country pushes interracial relationships very hard. We’re told that this is a good thing. For white people, it kind of is a good thing. I have precisely zero interest in Asian women and will go the rest of my life without dating one of them, but I know a lot of white guys who are way into it. I have male black friends who are very interested in white women and the feeling is sometimes mutual. But all this vibrant diversity is not without cost, and the cost isn’t borne by the white liberals who have been pushing interracial relationships since before Ralph Ellison wrote “Invisible Man”. It’s borne by people of color, black women and Asian men who find themselves incel (which, we remember stands for involuntarily celibate) and alone.
So while I was originally going to say that Wilkes was murdered by society, by media, by white appetites for sexual diversity, I think I’m going to modify that statement.
Wilkes wasn’t a suicide.
Wilkes wasn’t a murder victim.
Wilkes was the equivalent of an Incan virgin on the top of a pyramid. He was someone whose (quality of) life was deemed less important than a greater societal good.
Wilkes was, to put it plainly, a sacrifice.
I know a Black woman / Asian man couple, with three lovely kids. I actually saw them this morning, and thought to myself, I can’t ever remember seeing that before I met these people. So, kinda timely.
Statistical disadvantage is hardly a reason to resign one’s self to failure and end life. That’s very unfortunate.
We all have things to overcome, and I’m a tall white guy so clearly I might not have felt that sting. I was terribly awkward for some years though and it was simply something I had to work on to be socially successful and date women.
Jack you know about the PUA scene and some of those guys have overcome some great statistical adversity there to date models, white ladies, whatever it is they dream of.
If it is important to one you do what it takes. This just sounds like a bit of “I’m a nice guy why don’t women give me sex for buying them dinner” and that’s sad when a person would take their life because they think they should have gotten something without working for it.
My grandmother always said…you play the hand you are dealt.
“Statistical disadvantage is hardly a reason to resign one’s self to failure and end life. That’s very unfortunate.”
it’s excuse-making. if you sit and wait for the exact perfect woman you want to seek you out and throw herself at you, you’ll be waiting forever.
Re: Short men. A while back I saw a survey that said that 80% of American women will not even consider dating a man shorter than 5’8″ tall. Since I’m 5’6″ I’m glad I didn’t know this when I was younger and met the mother of my children, who is 5’11”. Of course as a very tall woman, her own dating pool was probably reduced slightly by the guys who won’t date a woman taller than them, so those stats might have helped my own. While I wasn’t blessed with great height, I do have a brain, a decent sense of humor and the ability to put a sentence together. Without those things, I likely wouldn’t have grandchildren.
85% of statistics are made up on the spot 😉
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=493pL_Vbtnc
It had to be done.
Although I fully sympathize with the guy. It’s a shallow world we live in. 🙁
Damn. This could have been a CH post.
I was actually just thinking the same thing. Well written
CH actually tweeted the incel’s post, which is where I first saw it; I would not be surprised to hear that Jack, too, had heard it from CH.
You, sir, are correct! But I view CH’s assertion that “game could have saved him” as reductive. Had Wilkes become an ass-tapper of the first order, he’d have displaced some other Asian guy who would then feel suicidal. It’s the tragedy of the commons, you see.
He was in Europe. A LOT of things are legal over there that can’t be done if he was living in the US. Honestly I think if I had ready access to prostitutes I wouldn’t EVER bother dating.
Is “ethnic purity” something that really matters or needs to be preserved in the first place?
Plus, this really only applies to Asian men and black women in the Western world. Since we’re being massively controversial here, the guy might have had some more luck if he hit up another country for a while.
Like I posted last night, getting laid isn’t an issue in a continent where brothels are legal. Sure maybe he wanted the deep emotional commitment of “love,” but sometimes a man just needs a cheap easy piece of hot ass to tide him over until he found “love.”
“Is “ethnic purity” something that really matters or needs to be preserved in the first place?”
Outbreeding depression is a real thing. A lot of alleles have come to rely on one another.
Culturally, I enjoy having a coherent ethnic background. When I read history, I can know virtually all of my ancestors were living on the North German plain, Scotland, and parts of Scandinavia, at least for the last 4000 years. It makes it all feel more connected & relevant to me.
Having spoken with the children of interracial marriages (even the ones that went well), they don’t feel as much of a connection with the past, heritage, tradition etc.
They don’t read things like this and get shivers
http://www.unz.com/gnxp/there-were-giants-in-the-earth-in-those-days/
Evaluating this information and formulating my own theory, while also staying up late on a Saturday night to watch over my child who is running a high fever, is proving to be too challenging.
I think I’ll return to an equally important, but less taxing conundrum…. Has Mazda Lost Its Zoom?
This story has a very Martin Manley vibe to it.
I think that part of the reason I have had romantic success at 5’4″ is that I favor redheads, an undervalued subset of white women. Being raised by an alpha female was also key to my being able to override my otherwise geek-like tendencies and have confidence with women. I have actively encouraged my 4’10” daughter to date Asian men. They are undervalued in the dating marketplace and she will likely get a mate with overall higher worth - better income prospects, faithfulness and intelligence - than if she continues to go after the 6’+ types she favors.
Oh man! Lowest market value. HAHAHA!
It helps to have that sweet, sweet Portuguese blood though!
Well
WinstonJack.I meet none of the 3 qualities. I am “white” for the most part, and I consider myself like that (mostly, but I don’t fuss too much about it), but I am the result of a lot of mestizaje (miscegenation is the translation from Google). My wife is a product of the same.
What you find hot in the media today, has been ongoing since the colony days in the place I come from. It varies in intensity from country to country in the land below the Rio Grande, but it has happened for ~500+ years.
It happened in southern Europe when the Muslims conquered most of Spain and quite likely has happened everywhere for like… forever. It is neither good nor bad, it’s just the way it is.
What may be happening here is that our Ingsoc overlords have just discovered the proverbial warm water and are using it to stir their usual class warfare discourse.
I read at the end of last year a paper about mice. “Death Squared: The Explosive Growth and Demise of a Mouse Population” by John B Calhoun MD. How I stumbled with it, I can’t remember -maybe a link from this blog. I know for sure is that I started finding interesting the relationship between what you call incels and the “beautiful ones”.
With all of the above, I don’t think this guy is a victim, much less a sacrifice. If any, it may be a small example of things to come.
Very interesting stuff. I lost it at “twist the knob right off”, so funny.
I have a Black female friend who is dating an Asian man. But, it’s the only female/male Blasian couple I’ve ever seen. Also, she spent a couple of years in Korea, so I’m sure that had an effect on her open-mindedness towards Asian men. That kimchi just changes a person!
After reading the OKCupid study, why didn’t Wilkes just pursue black women? Answer: We are all hypocrites, refusing to navigate outside our self imposed, externally influenced comfort zones, but ready and willing to judge others for refusing to navigate outside of theirs.
As a black guy, I hate most of all to be stereotyping, but I guess I’ll tell the truth as I’ve seen it over my time on this planet. Black Woman’s Attitude is a serious turnoff, and it doesn’t matter how hot the girl might be. And if you deal with it enough times, you eventually start to make generalizations and look elsewhere for companionship.
I would be curious how age factors in on the above studies. Having married young, and then divorcing in my early 20’s, I turned into what is called these days a “playa”. Continued that life style until my mid 40’s, when attitude and nature changed me. I was nothing special, 5′ 10″, 180lbs, average white boy, but was successful with, I would estimate, about 80% of the women I pursued. I dated Asian, German, Nordic, Latino, White ‘Murican, Italian, Irish, to identify most of them. I was fortunate to travel extensively overseas, and learned that there are different attitudes and customs in other countries that if you were not aware of would result in celibacy. These days, as I approach my “golden years”, I have a couple women friends I see regularly but for the most part I don’t mind living alone. As I have aged my needs and wants have changed and I have less interest in playing the “game” anymore.
But thats just me. As the ad’s tell us, your results may vary.
Great article Jack, but this dude was a VolCel not an InCel.
If I use Australian statistics ( which probably don’t differ that much from the UK), he was at an immense statistical advantage :-
45% of Australians are functionally illiterate
45% of Australians are functionally innumerate
( both with a strong male SKU)
50% of Australians have a double digit IQ.
Complete a Venn diagram of the above ( Assume he is literate, numerate, and has a 100IQ or above) and you have wiped out 70% of the population.
Then adjust for homosexuals, those imprisoned, those without a job ( which in Australia, have a higher male Skew on all those counts), and you are probably in the final 25%.
Okay, then you come down to height or racial preferences, and those not overweight, but you are already in the top quartile of eligible men.
This tells me, ( and I have been there), that his standards were too high. He was looking for women who were too young and too hot.
Yes, most women may prefer non-Asian men, or prefer men who are tall, but they also generally prefer; literate, numerate, heterosexual, employed men with a brain.
50% of everyone has a two-digit IQ. The test is calibrated so that 100 is average. Half of humanity is stupid. The other half is responsible for the worst ideas in history.
“Half of humanity is stupid. The other half is responsible for the worst ideas in history.”
I’m stealing this, if you don’t mind.
It’s actually normed so that British 17 year olds average 100 (with a 15 point standard deviation). Some population groups are higher, many are lower. World average is generally considered to be somewhere in the 87-92 range.
I think you’re on to something; his basic complaint was that society had engineered him to only be attracted to the women whom society had engineered to find him unattractive.
If so, could he have re-engineered himself to be attracted to other type of women?
I was also thinking that part of the problem could be the standards that the western media holds up to us as the “ideal” woman. If you are holding out for the six foot, buxom, Swedish super model you better be tall, fit, tan and handsome with a bank roll to boot. Unless of course you have stupid money like Tiger Woods!
I fail to see how society is at fault here. Here in the USA, I’m not picking up on a drumbeat of “you should date interracially.” It’s more like “you may date interracially” or “you should consider dating interracially” Would we rather see an attitude in society of “you should NOT date interracialy?” People are choosing to date certain people; I don’t see any arm-twisting going on. Maybe it’s very different in the UK.
That said, dude shouldn’t have taken his life without trying life in Orange County, California. There are LOTS of good-looking, successful, professional Asians in the OC.
seriously? that is why he jumped off a building?
what an idiot
RIP