1990 Lincoln Mark VII SE: Not Your Uncle Max’s Mark

The 1984 to 1992 Lincoln Mark VII was not your typical floaty, land yacht Lincoln. The new LSC (for Luxury Sport Coupe) model was the first Lincoln marketed as a driver’s car (well, at least since the ’50s ‘Road Race’ Lincolns, anyway), and could hold its own with much more expensive European coupes like the BMW 635CSi, something that would have been laughable just a year prior. The 1990-92 LSC Special Edition may have been the best of the bunch.

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British Car Boneyard Tour: Kilroy, Uh, I Mean, Lucas Was Here!


Back in June, in The Year Of Our Lord 2012 (damn, was that really almost eight years ago? Holy crap.), your author was able to finagle access to this eclectic collection of parts cars and Veddy British remnants after hearing about it from my brother Andy. It is not a big place, but it has some pretty interesting remains of Old Blighty. For instance, this Jaguar S-Type. Produced from 1963 to 1968, it was intended as a slightly fancier version of the venerable 3.8 Jaguar Mark II, and in fact was a Mark II, except for the new roofline, and caboose. It didn’t really take off though. Only about 25,000 were sold in six model years. It’s hard to see in the photo, but the one visible wheel is sporting a redline tire, like a late ’60s muscle car.

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Polar Opposites in Polo, Illinois…

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UPDATE: You Could Have Seen The Ark in Person at World of Wheels…

UPDATE: Well, the event has been cancelled to to all the germy germs and stuff. But what the heck I decided to let this run anyway. Laurie took some nice pictures!

March 20th through the 22nd would have been when the World of Wheels car show in Boston would have been held, but is now defunct-at least until next year! I’ve never been, but I’ve heard good things. Anyway, my pal Laurie Kraynick will be would have been there, and The Ark, her gorgeous aqua 1970 Cadillac Fleetwood Brougham, will be would have been there too. To say she is was excited would be would have been a massive understatement.

Deep into detailing and prepping last weekend. With a rum and Coke, naturally.

As she related:

“World Of Wheels, can you phucking believe it? Been going to that event since I got my driver’s license, now, I’m an exhibitor, with THE ARK. Just can’t believe it, so blessed, so happy. And I believe WOW is *SOLD OUT* for exhibitors, outstanding. This is gonna be a blast, what a bucket list check!”

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1982-84 Volvo 240DL: Old Reliable

Pop quiz, hotshot: What is the most boring 2020 model car in existence? Probably a Corolla, right? But what was the most boring, yet competent and efficient car of the 1980s? Not the Accord or Camry, for they hadn’t nailed rustproofing down yet. Those suckers dissolved like Alka Seltzer in the salty Midwest.

For those of you who missed the ’80s or were too young at the time to remember them, may I present the 1984 Volvo DL. It’s not a hot rod, not fancy, not exciting. But by God, it was competent, had comfortable seats, and were actually rust resistant, unlike some other ’80s fan favorites. There was good reason why in the ’80s, Volvo was known as “the car for people who think.” Well, as long as you didn’t mind paying Delta 88 money for one of these, ha ha.

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1970 1/2 Ford Falcon: Bargain Basement Torino

Despite a massive snowstorm back in February, The Year Of Our Lord 2013, things were going pretty good for me at the time. To keep it short, I’d been out of work for approximately a month, but through a mutual friend, Sunday Saunders, I was able to interview for a full-time accounting position at a local company. And I got the job. And still hold the job as of this writing. I was very happy, Anyway, back to 2013: Just after I left a voicemail message accepting the job, I started the car and prepared to drive away from the North Park Mall, where I’d been browsing at Barnes & Noble, and what did I see? This rather clean 1970 midsize Ford, parked at Olive Garden. In Winter. In the Midwest. Highly unlikely. But, wait? Is this really a Torino?

Despite the lack of Falcon scripts on the rear quarters, I believe it to be a 1970½ Falcon, of which 30,445 sedans were built. To my surprise, the Falcon sedan actually outsold the mid-line Fairlane 500, which sold 25,780 copies, as well as the Torino sedan, which sold 30,117.

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Late Night Town Cars: Or, When You Still Could Get A Late Model TC…

As Sophia Petrillo would say, Picture it: September 8, 2012. About twenty months after I’d been downsized from my job at the bank, and about two months since I’d returned to Illinois Casualty Company, where I’d worked 1995-2004. On the way home from my folks’ house after a fine dinner. I decided to drive through the local Chevy dealership to see if there was anything interesting. There were no truly interesting older trade ins (those were getting few and far between even then. Though we hadn’t hit Peak Crossover yet, things were deteriorating).

I liked these dew-covered Town Car Continental Editions, so parked the Ovlov wagon and snapped the pictures you see here, with my old digital camera. This was years before my DumbPhone self-destructed and I had to finally, grudgingly get a smart phone. I particularly liked the ice-blue one.

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1970 Chevrolet Camaro Six: Plain Jane Never Looked So Good

Note: Back when I originally wrote this in early 2013, it generated beaucoup comments. Not your average faux-SS Camaro, ha ha! Enjoy. And know that you can now share this throughout the web without giving the Cantankerous Coot clicks. *Dr. Evil laughter* -TK

The annual car show every September in Geneseo, IL, home of my Packard-restoring buddy, Dave Mitchell, is one of the best of the year. Even cars that are rarely seen usually show up, including an ex-service station Corvair Rampside, a Sunbeam Alpine roadster with factory hardtop, a simply fantastic 1960 Chevrolet Nomad station wagon, various excellent Studebakers and this original-condition, one-family-owned (at the time) 1970 Camaro.

1970 Camaro Ad

The ‘70.5 Camaro (so called because the uber-recognizable 1969 Camaro continued well into MY ’70 as an ‘early 1970’ model), was a surprising twist to Chevy’s ponycar. Gone was the three-box 1967-69 styling, replaced with Bill Mitchell’s interpretation of classic Italian lines-Ferrari in particular. It was a decade before I came on the scene, and 20 before I really started identifying cool old cars, but I think it is safe to say no one was expecting such a sleek, sexy design. It was especially beautiful with the RS split bumper, as shown above.

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