Resist! For #laborsavings

The e-mail said,

Meetup has always served as an organizing platform for a wide range of political views, welcoming everyone from the Howard Deaniacs to the Tea Party. Meetup will always welcome people with different beliefs.
But after the recent executive order aimed to block people on the
basis of nationality and religion, a line was crossed. At a time when core democratic ideals feel under attack, we feel a duty to spark more civic participation.
Last week, we created 1,000+ #Resist Meetup Groups to act as local hubs for actions on behalf of democracy, equality, human rights, social justice, and sustainability. Already 50,000+ people have joined.

I trust that most of my readers are too intelligent, or at least too cynical, to swallow that tripe at face value. What’s really going on?

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If You’re Not #withher, Then You’re #notwithus

Please welcome a lifelong friend of mine who is an honest-to-God, no-surgery-required, cisgender female. After a conversation we had recently, I implored her to share her views with our Riverside Green readers. To protect her identity, I’ve given her a username that makes me laugh. Enjoy!—Bark

On November 9, 2016, my best friend texted me. “Well, it’s done. I voted. I voted for HIM.” I laughed, because honestly, minus a tiny snippet of hope in the very back of my brain, I thought Hillary had the election in the bag. “Remember,” I said, “This was an easy decision. Better to vote for an honest asshole who gets economics than a dishonest criminal who is married to a dude who got a blow job in the Oval.” I got the “LOL” and we both went about our day. That night, I stared at the television, incredulous, as the ticker declared that Trump would win Wisconsin. My phone buzzed. “Holy Shit, Lizzie. He’s going to win this thing. You were right about the silent voters.”

I am a 38 year old, pro-choice, gay marriage supporter. I live in a state where it’s legal to buy marijuana for recreational purposes, and frankly, I have no problem with that whatsoever. I did not hesitate when I filled in my ballot in for Donald J. Trump. Oh, and I’m a woman with a graduate degree. But, up until now, I haven’t been able to talk about that at all, because there’s an incredibly curious phenomenon happening with women in America right now.

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Spot The Person Who Won’t Be Moving Back In With Mom And Dad

Question for my readers, some of whom haven’t lost their hearing to everything from a HK pistol to a Marshall Bluesbreaker: Did one of the snowflakes actually yell “Go back to Beijing!” at the end? I can’t make out what they’re saying.

Regardless, this fellow is the hero we need right now. Isn’t that the American Dream: work hard, study, and succeed? And here’s the final takeaway: When the “library guy” is a multi-millionaire success in his chosen profession, how receptive do you think he will be to “social justice” concerns, no matter how legitimate those concerns might be? They say that vaccines work, and I think that this video shows someone being successfully inoculated against left-wing viewpoints, whether that is for better or for worse.

What If You Held A Women’s March And Only Certain Women Were Allowed To Come?

“Bigger than Trump’s inauguration.” “The largest political demonstration since the Vietnam War.” The media hivemind has declared the “Women’s March” an unequivocal success — but what did it accomplish? And if it was truly a march by, for, and about women, then why were numerous women’s organizations prevented from participating? And, most importantly of all, who wrote the checks?

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No Power In The ‘Verse


How much money did you spend on your hobbies between September 1 and now? For Joss Whedon, the answer was: $508,374. His one-man PAC, “Save The Day”, made “comedy videos” featuring a remarkable assemblage of Hollywood celebrities. As you can probably guess, the purpose of the videos was to encourage young people to get out there and vote for Hillary. (Brief aside: Is Hillary Clinton like Madonna or Cher now? A one-name person? How does Hilary Swank feel about that? She won two Oscars!)

Mr. Whedon’s contribution amounted to just one-quarter of one percent of Mrs. Clinton’s SuperPAC money. (If you want to get a terrifying look at the funding behind both campaigns, and chuckle a bit at what a bargain Mr. Trump’s campaign was compared to Mrs. Clintons, the Washington Post has some very well-explained numbers for you.) As a long-time Firefly fan, and as an even longer-time fan of the democratic process, I am proud of Joss for putting his money where his mouth is. Supposedly he’s worth $100M — think about putting one-half of one percent of your personal wealth into an election. That would be like the average middle-class family writing a $1,000 check for Clinton or Trump, which almost never happens.

Unfortunately for Mr. Whedon and rest of Hillary’s supporters, he didn’t get anything for his money. That’s politics for you. You don’t get a refund if your guy (or gal) doesn’t win. But Joss has decided that he wants to get what he paid for, no matter what.

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Like A Phoenix Rising From The Ashes


I’m not gonna lie. 24 hours ago, I thought the Republican party was dead.

I figured Hillary Clinton was well on her way to surpassing 300 electoral votes—perhaps even racing past the Obama ’12 total of 332. It was a foregone conclusion that the Democrats would reclaim the Senate, as well. I began to think about how eight more years of Obamacare and progressive social policies would create an entire generation of Julias, unable to perceive any possible existence that didn’t involve the evermore intrusive and invasive government’s presence in every facet of their lives. I foresaw a world where all conservative ideals and principles were denounced as racist, sexist, and nationalist, where no man would be permitted to hold a view that didn’t adhere to the one given to him by the media. I imagined a 2024 election much like a California Senate race, where two Democrats ended up fighting for the right to be President. I thought that I would never see another Republican president in my lifetime.

Of course, I was incredibly, gleefully wrong. And so was everybody else.

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Rapin’ For Harambe (No Motorcycle Content)

Did Clemson University ban the posting of Harambe photos in their dormitories? The answer is “yes”, although Clemson personnel have been quick to walk that back and the media has been only too happy to assist. Supposedly, Harambe photos are “racist” and “promote rape culture”. And while USA Today might give Clemson a pass because the edict came through in an email, I can tell you from personal experience that defying a “head res” at a university can get you expelled in a hurry. An email from Residence Life has the force of law to a freshman, excuse me, first-year student.

The alert reader will note that there is nothing particularly rape-oriented or racist about discussing a gorilla, so long as you are not directly comparing a biracial sitting president, or his black wife, to a gorilla. (Tt’s not racist at all if the president in question is white, dontcha know.) So why ban Harambe memes or photos?

The answer is simple: Harambe, along with Pepe, is an icon of the alt-right. Posting a Harambe meme can be seen as a silent nod towards the alt-right, the same way that shouting “PEPE!” at the President-Elect is a nonsilent shout-out to the alt-right. The Residence Life staff at Clemson banned Haramabe because they don’t want the alt-right, or even the non-alt-right, to have any voice on the Clemson campus. Plain and simple. Thought police in full effect.

The problem that the Orwellians of the campus left face is this: memes shape-shift too fast to be trapped. If we can’t have Harambe, maybe we can have “Gorilla Munch”. Don’t get your jimmies rustled, you hear?

Finally, The First Amendment Gets The Second Amendment Treatment


“When I am weaker than you, I ask you for freedom because that is according to your principles; when I am stronger than you, I take away your freedom because that is according to my principles.” Most people know this quote from the Dune books, where it is retroactively attributed to Louis Veuillot. The attribution may or may not be true but the saying itself is a truth that has an echo in history all the way back to the dawn of man.

For the past twenty years or so, I’ve had a saying of my own: “If we treated the First Amendment like we treated the Second Amendment, it would only apply to Revolutionary-era printing presses and actual wooden soapboxes.” After all, the only firearms in this country that enjoy authentic Second Amendment protection are blackpowder muzzle-loaders. Your right to order a blackpowder muzzle-loader and keep it loaded by your bed is basically the only undamaged firearms right left. It even applies to felons, although felons may not have the cap primer that makes modern blackpowder rifles vaguely reliable. Every other kind of gun is subject to a Byazntine admixture of state, federal, and local laws.

Our Supreme Court has continually interpreted the Constitution as a “living” document. Which means that they’ve been free to whittle down the Second Amendment as they like, while expanding the First Amendment to cover everything from the airwaves to the Internet to public defecation “art” to the infamous Citizens United decision. The word “militia”, which originally referred to the “militia” that overthrew King George, has been redefined as the National Guard. Meanwhile, “speech” has been expanded to mean every form of communication imaginable plus money plus behavior. That expansion is the lever by which socially liberal people and organizations have reshaped America in their desired image. Without the freedom to carpet-bomb Americans with everything from freaky old titties at the Super Bowl to a coalition of media that lampoons and undermines traditional family life, we’d probably still be living in the early Sixties.

Whether this is a good or bad thing is a matter of opinion, or perhaps a matter of degree. I like having the freedom to read D.H. Lawrence but I’m not sure I would want my eight-year-old daughter, if I had one, to be exposed to a bunch of swinging dicks in bathrooms just because such a “freedom” is the current cause celebre in California. Regardless of the merits of America’s social transformation, however, you cannot argue that it could have been done without hugely liberal (in the classic sense) interpretations of the First Amendment. But remember that maybe-Herbert quote above, because it applies starting now.

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